Wednesday Morning Coffee

Boy, do I need the coffee today. [yawn] On with the frivolity...

* DOA MEANS "DIRK OWNED ALWAYS"?!?: If you check my XBL gamer card at right, you'll see that I got another game for my 360: Dead or Alive 4. I've been playing the DOA series since DOA2 on the Dreamcast and I've been a fan of the lovely kickass ladies, but now the ladies are kicking my ass. They've tweaked the commands or something, but now instead of having a fairly easy time chugging thru the Story Mode to unlock new outfits, I was frequently frustrated almost to the degree that Team Ninja's last game, Ninja Gaiden, did to me. It looks great, though not drastically better than "Dead or Alive Ultimate", but it's just HARD, bordering on no fun. [pouts]

* SPEAKING OF HARD, A SURVEY BY THE MAKERS OF VIAGRA shows that Austrians are supposedly the most sexually satisfied people in the world. (Good for you Ahnuld!) The least satisfied: Japan. (If my Japanese porn is to be believed, it explains why Godzilla is always flattening the place.)

* ABOUT THAT DOPEY JAMES BONDESQUE MUSIC ON "24": Laura Ingraham was bitching about it today as I was getting out of the car and she said she had sent creator Joel Surnow a note to knock it off. It IS cheesy and low-rent. Best fake Bond music? Paul Oakenfold's "Ready Steady Go", which seems to be everywhere from the club scene in "Collateral" to the current Saab commercials.

* YOU KNOW YOU'RE OLD WHEN you tell your elderly mother than TomKat's kitten was named Suri and when she mischievously asks, "Does she have fringe on top?", you know what she's talking about.